Date Update

It went very, very well.

That's all I have time to write right now. :)

The One Thing I'm Picky About

So I'm going on a date tonight. It's an eHarmony guy, so who knows. We actually went to the same high school, although didn't know each other back then (he's a couple years younger than me). We've talked a few times on the phone and the conversations are really good. We have the same sense of humor and the words just kinda flow. He's funny, nice, friendly. We know a lot of the same people, so I feel like we kinda already know each other.

Here's the problem. I hate to admit this, but I'm a girl who needs to feel that instant connection when I meet someone. Like I have to feel like I want to rip off your clothes right then. Not that I would. Let's make that clear... NOT THAT I WOULD. But I have to at least feel like I want to. If I don't feel that way, no matter how good the date is, no matter how much fun we have, no matter how sweet/nice/funny/good for me he is... well likely it's never gonna happen. I might try to force it and go out with you again, but probably every time it will end the same. No feelings of wanting more and therefore not working out. It's frustrating cuz it's the one area in my life that I'm picky about. And I try not be, because it makes me feel like a bitch.

So while I'm looking forward to the date, I'm kinda not looking forward to it also. I think we'll probably have a good time, but if that connection isn't there... well I don't know. I'll let you know how it goes.

In other news, I went over to my brother's last weekend cuz he was having some people over. Three of the guys there were brothers and all three of them have hit on me in the past. Not at the same time. And not that they all knew it (I don't think at least, cuz that would be weird). It was a little awkward. There's not really anything more to that story, just wanted to share.

Happy weekend all!

Ego, much?

Okay, so I know at the end of my last post I said I probably wasn't really going to contact The Reason. But I did. I figured, what the hell? I haven't talked to this man or seen him in a year and a half, we got matched again, which I know he knows about, so I'll just send him a message to say hi. So this is the message I sent him:

Hey (The Reason)-
So apparently eHarmony and Dr. Warren really want us to be together, given the fact that we were "matched" again. Haha. Seriously, I just thought it was funny, so decided to drop you a not to say hi. Hope all is well with you. Let me know if you want to get together for a drink sometime.
Take Care-
Jenn

No big deal, right? Just a friendly gesture. He didn't even have to respond if he didn't want to, since I didn't ask him any direct questions. And yet, this is the response I got:

Yeah I saw that too, funny how eharm works. I hope you are well too and Bruno (my dog) is behaving. I've been hanging out with this girl I met at a bar. Don't know if it's gonna go anywhere as she is way too young for me (23). Given our history, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be involved with me at the moment cuz I'd probably hurt you again and I don't want to do that. Maybe later on we can get a drink but I'll let you know then. Hope your fam is well and it was good hearing from you again.
-(The Reason)

Umm... maybe I'm wrong, but I don't remember saying anything to him about getting involved with him again, did I? I was just trying to be nice, which apparently in his world that means I want to get back together with him. Wow, not so much in my world... I don't want to get back together with him. I don't want to date him. I don't even want to be friends with benefits with him. I thought that maybe, MAYBE, we could be friends. Not even friends who see each other or hang out a lot. I guess more just friendly. (Okay, I admit it, I wanted to just use him for his pool over the summer).

Needless to say, I didn't respond. I felt like the fact that he would even assume that I want to be "involved" again just shows that I've matured past the situation while he hasn't. My friends think I need to write him back and take his ego down a bit by telling him that I didn't want to be involved with him, that I was just being friendly. But I don't think I need to. Thoughts?

Matched Again

I know, I know. I'm a horrible blogger. I haven't been around. And when I have been, the stories have not been all that interesting. Last week I had a painful episode of tendonitis in my wrist and was told, by doctors (fine, yes they were also my parents) that I should try to not type as much. So I took a break. I'm back. We'll see if I can find something fun to write about today...

I'm ready to date, to get back out there, to meet new guys. Problem was that I hadn't been out in weeks and I wasn't meeting too many guys sitting at home by myself. Strange. S is dating a new(ish) guy (he's actually her ex from high school. they've been broken up for like 6 years, but started hanging out a while back and decided to try it again). Couple that with the fact that it's remained winter, despite my hoping daily that I'll wake up to warm weather, and S and I have not gone out since the first week in January. Yes, I had gone to that hockey game and then actually went out that same weekend with a friend, but that was the first time in literally 5 weeks I had left my house for an evening. Then I came to the realization that, yes, I still like Juice but clearly he is not ready for me. Will he ever be? Who knows. If it works out that I'm still single if/when he decides he is ready for me, then maybe we'll try again. But in the meantime? What the hell am I doing wasting my time pining away for someone who clearly does not want to be with me? Nope. Done. And all of this combined to make my decision a firm one. I joined eHarmony again.

I haven't actually met anyone yet. Or even gotten to the "open" communication stage with anyone yet. But we'll see. I'm hopeful, but mostly it gives me other guys to think about. And it's fun to get new matches every day! Even when one of the matches is none other than... The Reason.

That's right folks. The guy I dated for a year, and then some, showed up as a match in this morning's batch of emails. Wow. Now, let me say that The Reason has a very unique name, so I knew it was him immediately. I just started laughing. Seriously? I mean, seriously eHarmony? Again, wow. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, given that eHarmony is how he and I met and ended up dating in the first place and given that he recently broke up with his girlfriend. I just wasn't expecting it. Even funnier... when I logged on to eHarmony later to send some communications and check out my new matches, I clicked on "Who's Viewed Me?" (which is new to me... last time I was on there, they didn't have this gem) and found that he indeed had looked at my profile. And, while he didn't communicate with me, he also didn't close me. Maybe he doesn't ever close anyone... but he had to know it was me. Granted I chopped my hair off after we broke up, but I have some of the same pics on myspace and facebook as I do on eHarmony and I know he's seen them there.

The over-analytical part of me immediately goes, "if he knew it was me and didn't close me, does that mean he's open to talking again?" And that makes part of me want to send him a message over facebook or something, making a joke of us being matched again, and seeing if he wants to get a drink sometime, as old friends. I don't think I actually will. After all, I've worked hard to move on with my life. And I want to move forward, not backward. But if nothing works out soon, it may just come to that! Ha ha