Okay, so I know at the end of my last post I said I probably wasn't really going to contact The Reason. But I did. I figured, what the hell? I haven't talked to this man or seen him in a year and a half, we got matched again, which I know he knows about, so I'll just send him a message to say hi. So this is the message I sent him:
Hey (The Reason)-
So apparently eHarmony and Dr. Warren really want us to be together, given the fact that we were "matched" again. Haha. Seriously, I just thought it was funny, so decided to drop you a not to say hi. Hope all is well with you. Let me know if you want to get together for a drink sometime.
Take Care-
Jenn
No big deal, right? Just a friendly gesture. He didn't even have to respond if he didn't want to, since I didn't ask him any direct questions. And yet, this is the response I got:
Yeah I saw that too, funny how eharm works. I hope you are well too and Bruno (my dog) is behaving. I've been hanging out with this girl I met at a bar. Don't know if it's gonna go anywhere as she is way too young for me (23). Given our history, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be involved with me at the moment cuz I'd probably hurt you again and I don't want to do that. Maybe later on we can get a drink but I'll let you know then. Hope your fam is well and it was good hearing from you again.
-(The Reason)
Umm... maybe I'm wrong, but I don't remember saying anything to him about getting involved with him again, did I? I was just trying to be nice, which apparently in his world that means I want to get back together with him. Wow, not so much in my world... I don't want to get back together with him. I don't want to date him. I don't even want to be friends with benefits with him. I thought that maybe, MAYBE, we could be friends. Not even friends who see each other or hang out a lot. I guess more just friendly. (Okay, I admit it, I wanted to just use him for his pool over the summer).
Needless to say, I didn't respond. I felt like the fact that he would even assume that I want to be "involved" again just shows that I've matured past the situation while he hasn't. My friends think I need to write him back and take his ego down a bit by telling him that I didn't want to be involved with him, that I was just being friendly. But I don't think I need to. Thoughts?
3 comments:
sometimes it's better to just leave things alone. i probably wouldn't respond, but you have to do what you think is best. i think that response would have taken me by surprise :)
I have to be honest. If I was The Reason and I read that email, I would absolutely think you wanted more then just being friends. Guys are guys. The friends thing isn't the first thing they think of. They see their ex writing and asking to get drinks. Very black and white.
I donno much about your situation with this guy, because I just started reading your blog a few weeks ago. But, if you don't write back, he might think you are not responding because you're mad/upset about his answer. He might think that you are being the immature one, even though you had other intentions.
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