Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Outraged and celibate

I am seriously outraged by men currently. Okay, hold up. Maybe not seriously, since I've had a few days, about a week, to let this sink in. And really I'm outraged in behalf of a friend. No man has done anything to me recently. Mostly because I've taken a new vow of celibacy. Not really, but I'll get into that more in a minute.

I won't get into a lot of details, because it's her life and not mine, but I will give a brife explanation. My friend had been dating her boyfriend for several months. The past few months, he'd been a little more distant, and she thought it was just the whole thought process of, "Well now that she's mine, I don't have to try and impress her as much." (Which by the way, fellas? Not true!) Anyway, last week, she talks to her man early in the evening, he says he's at a store with his mom and he'll call her back, hanging up after telling her he loved her. A few hours later, she hasn't heard from him, so she calls him back. A girl answers the phone. My friend calls me and we meet up at a bar she knows her boyfriend goes to a lot. He's there with some girls. My friend confronts him, he denies anything is going on. Then, when we've turned away, he hides from us. While he's hiding, one of the girls comes up to us and says that he has been sleeping with her friend for 4 months. 4 MONTHS???!!!

What I don't get is why he would do this. If he started seeing another girl, then why not just break up with my friend? How can he still go on family vacations with her, spend time over at her house, go golfing with her stepfather, etc.? How can he still tell her every day that he loves her? Especially since she had asked him about a week before if he wanted to break up, since he was acting funny. And he said no. That he loved her and there was no one else. If he really loved her, how could he do that to her? Knowing that neither she nor I had a high respect for men when they started dating, and he heard us bitch about the stupid assholes all the time. How could he turn around and do something that awful? And the thing is that he probably would have kept it going if she hadn't caught him. F'ing ridiculous. I mean, I've had some guys do some seriously shitty things, but I think this takes the cake. Yeah, its similar to what the young ex did to me, but I had only known him a month. Not in a relationship with him for several months. Seriously, why are guys such assholes.

Which leads me to my (fake) celibacy. I decided a while ago that if nothing came from the whole Boston thing (btw, never heard from him again. oh well) that I was not sleeping with anyone for 6 months. I know that probably seems like nothing to some people, and I'm not a whore sleeping with everyone in sight or anything, but I enjoy sex. And I've been known to occasionally still sleep with my young ex from time to time as a release. But I mean it. Nothing until at least March. No birthday sex, no New Years sex, no Valentines day sex. No Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas sex (yeah, this is how I think. lol) I'm hoping this at least makes me forget about men, concentrate on other things. Everyone says it'll happen when you stop looking. Well, I've stopped. And after what happened to my friend, I'm not sure I'll ever start looking again.

3 comments:

chickbug said...

well...the good news is she doesn't have to waste her time with him anymore. just keep reminder her it is HE who is an idiot, not her.

Maria said...

well he was a jerk. 6 months without sex...seems like such a long time ;) I'm sure you can do it though hehe

Auburn Kat said...

How about being with a guy for 6 yrs, moved to two states halfway across the country for his job, had three cats together AND bought a house together cheating on you. Yup, that would be lucky me! I've sworn off men for awhile...it's almost been a yr since we brokeup and I am not any closer to being ready for a relationship with any man. Some men really are jerks...