Friday, November 14, 2008

Advice Needed

So here's the situation...

S is my best friend. She has been dating her boyfriend for all of 3 weeks now, but they've known each other since April. Thank you softball. Anyway, he is completely head over heals in love with her. I know this not only from Juice (we gossiped about it when we were dating) and also straight from him. He knows she is the one for him.

Now S has this habit of joking around about things, and being only half-kidding when she does so. So I know that everything she says has at least a little truth behind it. So when she and the boyfriend started joking around about getting married on May 24, I knew there was at least part of her that was serious, but she probably figured he wasn't.

S also usually tells me everything. She has told me that she really cares for her boyfriend a lot, but she hasn't actually used the term "love", at least not around me. She could be telling him she loves him all the time. In fact, from a conversation I had with him, it sounds like maybe she does. I guess my point here is that I don't know if she's downplaying her feelings around me cuz of the Juice situation (which she totally wouldn't have to do) or if she's playing up her feelings to him. All of this is just background info for the pickle I find myself in...

He's planning on asking her to marry him on Nov. 24, 1 month from the day they started dating. He has it all planned out (and it's really cute and romantic). I know this because he told me. Because she hasn't ever told me she loves him, I'm not sure she's going to say yes, which would crush him. From what he has said to me, he truly believes that she will say yes, so maybe he knows more than I do.

My point is that I feel like I should say something, but I don't really think it's my place. I know that she wants it to be a surprise when a guy proposes to her (cuz we've talked about these things), so I don't feel like I can tell her he's going to ask. And I don't want to stick my foot in my mouth by telling him he should maybe hold off on the proposal for a little while if she really is in love with him and wants to marry him. The past couple days I've joked around with her about the fact that they were going to get married, and she just kinda laughs and says, "yeah, okay. or he's gonna turn into a big jerk like the rest of the guys we know." So I can't tell if she really wants to or not. I'm afraid that he's gonna ask and it's all gonna blow up in everyone's face if she says no. He really is good for her and I think would treat her well, but I think it's rushing it a bit.

What do you think? Say something to one of them, and if so, who? Or just wait and see what happens?

Oh, and btw, I'm guest posting over here tomorrow. Come check it out!

3 comments:

AP said...

wow. I would seriously say- don't say anything to either one. It sounds like she really wants it to be a surprise when she gets proposed to. And with him- if he's wanting to propose, there's a good chance he's really confident she'll say yes, because what guy wants rejection to that question? So... I would just let it play out.

- Emma Elizabeth

Maria said...

oy that is a hard one. i wouldn't say anything to either one. let things happen like they should. sucks you are stuck in the middle. i can't wait to hear what happens though!

chickbug said...

I know I'm late with this advice. But wow...this is a tough one! Being the nosy-over protective friend I am, I would probably try and have a "what do you really think about the boy" conversation and try and get a sense for if she does really love him. Even ask her flat out. If she says no, I would go to the boy and say to wait. If she says yes, I would keep my mouth shut and let it play out.

P.S.- You watch Lipstick Jungle, right? This is exactly like what happened with Victory!