Weekend update and random thoughts

I'm all over the place today, admittedly. First, a weekend update...

Saturday S and I did indeed go to the OSU-Michigan game and it was all we could have hoped for. Unless you have loyalties to one of these schools, you may not know all about the storied rivalry. But it's one of the biggest and so I was quite pleased with another Buckeyes win. (And don't worry, my Hurricane friends, you all know I root for them over the Buckeyes any day). Anyway, S and I then go pick up her son and go to a friend's house where a bunch of the softball players are hanging out watching football and playing cards. She drove there and I would have followed in my car, but she indicated we'd be there late so I didn't see any reason to drive both cars. Yes, Juice was there. Awkward? Not so much. I don't have any problems with him, still care about him, still (stupidly maybe) want to be with him, and at least want to be friends so no big deal...

Without going into great details, cuz that would take a few pages to write, basically Juice and I are fine with each other being there, and in fact flirting. Because, if you recall, when we broke up it wasn't because we didn't still want to be with one another. After a while, he and I go out to the garage so we can talk a bit and of course end up making out. (What?! We both had had a few drinks. Don't judge!) So of course when everyone else realizes what we're doing, they all take turns coming and interrupting us by opening the door to the garage. Because, you know, we're in middle school and that's funny stuff. We finally give it up and go back inside. Around 8:30, S's bf says he's gonna go. Which, apparently, meant that she was gonna go too. But she didn't say that to me, so I kept playing poker. And then I realize that she's wanting to go, so I ask Juice if he'll take me back to my car later. S gets pissed at this, because she thinks I'm being stupid by wanting to stay. I'm sorry, but it's 9 on a Saturday night and I'm single and live alone. Even if Juice wasn't there, I woulda wanted to stay and hang out. So she and I get into a huge fight, which Juice sees and knows he's the reason for it. So after S leaves, Juice also leaves, leaving me with no way to get home. His best friend ended up taking me back to my car, which at least allowed me to get some info from him.

Basically, I'm pissed at the whole situation. Yes, Juice shouldn't have left. I'm not saying he isn't to blame here or that there's any excuse for that. But I can't help but think that if everyone would have just left us alone, since we're both adults and can make our own decisions, maybe it wouldn't have gotten to that point. Or maybe if S hadn't been so pissed at me for wanting to stay, causing this big blow-up between the two of us, he wouldn't have left. He already thinks that he's not good enough for me, so hearing S basically say that to me probably didn't help. I get that she was just looking out for me and trying to be a good friend, but the look on her face was so judgemental. And it's not her place. And it wasn't like I was under the assumption he and I were getting back together. I just was enjoying hanging out with him and everyone else. So that's that. I'm still just pissed at the whole situation.

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The reason S's boyfriend wanted to leave so early Saturday night (not that I knew it at the time) was cuz he was proposing to her that night. I thought he was doing it today, but I guess he just couldn't wait. My thoughts? It's way too fast. They've only been dating a month and haven't even had their first fight yet. It'll come, and I wonder what will happen. I wonder if she's really in love or just likes him enough to settle. Not that he isn't a good guy, but it just seems so fast. Oh yeah, she said yes. Maybe I'm just jealous.

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This site (http://finallyseeing.tumblr.com for some reason my link isn't working)has so many awesomely good quotes that always get to me. here are some of my favorites that I read today:

"If you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind wanders."

"Every time I think about you, I have to remind myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would."

"You're letting her think she has a chance. And there is nothing worse in the world than thinking you have a chance when you really don't."

"The truly painful goodbyes are the ones that are never said and never explained."

"My heart says "who cares?". My head says "you do, stupid.""

That's all I got.